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  • Rachelle MiIlar

How to enjoy your own company?


Well there is often a deeper answer to many of life's questions and this one got me thinking about a poem I was given many years ago about realizing that you have self worth. And whilst that poem could have many meanings, in this context it is key. If you are to enjoy your own company then you have to become comfortable with your self. In that you value your self. (Worth is about value isn't it?) So you have to value your time alone, with your self.

If this value is low, then it is likely that you are filling this up with external validation. Many times the most confident and gregarious people look that way because it is so important to their self worth to be validated by others. Approval can become a massive thing to manage and can often come at the cost of your self. Your authentic self.

Why do I know this, because I was this person... my self worth was low and whilst others telling me to love my self, I saw this as an external way of looking at the loving, I am good looking, I dress well, etc, of course I love myself!. Learning that, that was not loving one self was quite a different matter, loving one self is not conditional, it does not come from a place of validation and logic and ego, it comes from a place or purity, soul stuff, it is not the outward appearance that the fashion magazines portray it is the inward stuff that not many talk about.

Many times we create meaning out of life to manage our self esteem, we can take meaning out of interactions and change the way we relate. It is all a journey, but until that journey is inward and we heal the wounds that were made and make choices from a place of freedom and not from pain. From love and not from fear, then we cannot truly live in our bliss, in joy. Yes, they say happiness is a choice, but it is not a simple choice, it comes from a deeper part of us that chooses to live in ALL of our self.

So how do we enjoy our own company, ensure that the company that you seek fills you up and brings you joy that you are not running from loneliness but running towards company that fills you up so much that you cannot take any more. Make time for yourself because you are important and valuable and you need that time to be comfortable with the company that you keep. It is you, when you find your happy place in you, then you will find a far greater happiness with others.

So plant your own garden and decorate your own soul and really know that you truly have self worth.

And that self is worth spending time with.


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